Thursday, 6 October 2011
You understand?
This Counsellor Mrs Derrett, she understand apparently. I haven't told her anything to make her understand, she just picks it up, she tricks it out of me... Yet she always seems to know what I'm on about even if I stop mid sentence, she's... Intuitive? I think that's the word, when someone just picks up on something? Anyway, so yeah. I went to see her today and I got irritated at this girl, because she was there telling me all these things and saying how it was my fault I was in this mood, it was my fault that I got myself into those situations, and I was just like. Fuck you! I thought I was pregnant, I was HOPING I was, for some sick reason. I Hoped I could have a child, but I didn't want to be in that state, I didn't even want what happened to happen and she doesn't even know this, so what the fuck gives her the right to tell me its my fault?! Being locked in a room and pinned to the floor was really my fault wasn't it. There, I finally told you all what happened on my holiday. But I was just there today like who the hell do you think you are?! I'm devastated about Not having a child in me as twisted as that is, I'm not really "Mentally stable" right now, and she have the cheek to tell me that I was being a cow and that really she hadn't done anything. You didn't have to. You provoked me bitch. The worst thing is, I Warned her! I told her I probably wasn't going to be in the best of moods today and I certainly wasn't going to be up for her not funny humour and digs at me all the time. On a different note, I'm totally stressing about college. I have applied to everywhere for the same subjects so hopefully it will happen, but the English Literature recommended reading list is huge! and I've read Loads of books in my lifetime, but I've only read three from this list, I'm so far behind its unbelievable. -.- So I went and got some books from the library today, -.- about 7. and I already have 5 under my bed to read. So yeah, lets just hope my reading ability comes back fricken soon eh? Sorry for ranting on you darlings, its been a shit day, Love you's <3
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Lovely thinspo, and good luck with English lit! I couldn't do it, all the analysing would drive me crazy, english language for the win ;) Stay strong xx
ReplyDeletei wanted to do both, but it would've clashed with my want to do psychology, law and government and politics also xD we can only do four :/ <3
ReplyDeleteGood luck with reading all the books!
ReplyDeleteAnd I hope tomorrow will be a better day for you ♥
wow. Thats terrible that a) that happened to you in the first place, and b) whoever girl that is is an utter BITCH. As if telling you its your fault you got put into that situation is really going to help anything. but I am glad you have someone who understands you without you having to even say anything. Keep her close and be honest to her. She's the kind of person you need to feel better in the long run :)
ReplyDeleteThanks guys and I know peanut, shes a nasty cow -.- but i have to put up with her because shes a friend of a friend :/ <3
ReplyDeleteGod that is a lot of books! I suspect if I do English at A Level grade my reading list will soon shoot up too. :/ I mean, I like reading, the lists I've seen of friends look horrible though.
ReplyDeleteShe sounds a fricking... Wow. She's like one of the reasons I can barely get along with women/girls. I would have found it hard not to hurt her or something.
At least your counselor is pretty good. It's always nice to have someone who understands you. xx
I'm glad your counsellor understands, it's nice to have that! And that girl sounds like a total cow, honestly. urgh. girls can be so frickin annoying sometimes
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