Taking a train ride to blood-let city central.

Rice has to be the worst feeling thing that I've ever purged. Its just vile. My sister leaves tonight for her nan's, she won't be back until tuesday so I get some time to myself (I get time to do fuck-loads of exercise and eat barely anything because mum forgets she has children when the attention seeker leaves...I'm glad she's going, I need to weigh myself tomorrow, and if she was here, she'd ask me why I was crying after I stepped off the scales. She'd tell me how thin I was (when I'm clearly not as the scales will tell tomorrow) then she'd tell mother that I was on the scales and crying, mum would check my hips, she'd see the cuts/scars, she'd yell and it'd be the start of year 11 all over again. I can't have that. I feel really sorry for (Fire) she has to put up with me being a fuck up and never getting better so much that I'm surprised she hasn't won a medal or something equally as grand yet.
 Tomorrow's the big day, the day I hand in my writing to my English teacher and see whether I'm actually decent at anything. I'm making myself sick worrying about what she'll say. If she says its crap that'll push me over the edge, I'll just break down in tears. All the shit that's gone on this week, being told I cant write to save my life would be that one jenga block too many, the one you push out and the whole thing falls over. I need to scream, but nothings coming out, because I know its not acceptable to scream in my house. If I could break down without being asked why I'm crying and an answer demanded in this house, I would. I reckon my hips will be taking a ride to blood-let city central tonight. Its time for some more of my life to be tattooed to my body. Too many things have happened to go without...Bye my Angels <3