I'll show you just how crazy I can be.

This life I tried to leave behind is like a really addictive drug. And I'm relapsing. I just want to die. I don't even want to be here anymore. I just don't want to be alive.
 Some girl who's supposedly my friend went to me today 'If you're Soooo ill like people say you are, then tell me all the stuff you've got, I bet what I've got's much worse' So I go through my list of normal issues like: My clicky hips (My hip bones grind together and are wearing themselves down, my anaemia, my asthma, my arthritis in my hands, feet and knees, my double joints that mean my bones pop out of place at any given time, my feet that turn in which makes it difficult to walk properly because all of my bones have grown the wrong way, my smaller lungs, my bad circulation, my terrible immune system. And she goes 'people told me you had more wrong with you, so what is it?' 'If people told you, you already know don't you?' 'Yes, but I wanted to hear about your "Mental issues" from you freak.' 'How does me having issues regarding my sanity make me a freak?' 'I don't think you really have issues at all, I think you just make it up for attention, you're an attention seeker that's what you are, a Sick attention seeker who just wants everyone's eyes on her, I cant believe you're fucking disgusting enough to make up something like that' 'I'm not making it up...'
And it went on like that, until eventually, I smacked her across the face and told her to leave me the fuck alone or I'd show her exactly what coming from where I do means. I'd show her just how crazy I could be. That if she didn't leave me alone, things'd get real messy real quickly, and before she could call me a freak again, she'd be on the floor wishing she'd taken my advice.
I couldn't help it! I didn't mean to threaten her, or smack her, but it was her fault. Afterall, I am 'Mental' It cant be helped from a freak like me. 
I am back down to a 1. And I think I'll stay here forever. I don't want to go back up just to have some tramp come alone and knock me back down again, if I stay here, there's no chance of being knocked lower than I am...I just want to be normal, why can't I be fucking normal? I just want to go one day without being a freak. Why am I like this? Why cant I be like everyone else? Un-freakishness is the only thing I wish for. Bye my Angels <3