I am the devil, that makes you question your existance...

Twilight was such an anti-climax? if I can use that there... I mean it was good, but it wasn't Really good, like I thought it would be. Maybe it just wasn't that good because I didn't have a lad there to hold onto on the scary eating stomach parts and such :L I don't know, but either way, it bored me slightly. I was in a really negative mood today, because everyone in Twilight had someone there to hold them through the parts they just wanted to be held through and I was taken with my Mother and Sister. I really shouldn't be so negative, because I sort of have someone, in a complicated fashion, but I don't know, even though I adore this person to actual bits, I just sometimes wish I had a lad there to hold me, sometimes I wonder if I'm actually Bi, or if I'm just going along with it because I adore this person, but then, do I adore her like a best friend, or a sister, or something more? Its confusing and if they read this, they'd probably think I really hated them and that I was going off them, even if I'm not, I'm just being negative about things, Maybe I'm just straight and they're manly xD ? I don't know, things confuse me, but then that's what its called isn't it? Being confused? Maybe I'm supposed to feel this strange :L I wonder what will happen next year when we go to college, when we get split up, will we be able to stick it out? or will we grow apart, will we grow to hate each other? resent each other for something or other? or will we just simply cease to be friends? -.- I need to stop thinking, sometimes it really gets me down, and I know it will get Them down when they read this, but these are my thoughts so they can shove it if they hate it, I'm allowed to wonder aren't I? Or maybe I'm not supposed to? I DON'T KNOW ¬_¬ Helps me? <3